Video: Make Three New Friends.

2010 Happiness Challenge: For those of you following the 2010 Happiness Project Challenge, to make 2010 a happier year – and even if you haven’t officially signed up for the challenge — last month’s theme was Family, and last week’s resolution was to Acknowledge the reality of other people’s feelings. Did you try to follow that resolution? Did it help to boost your happiness?

This week’s resolution is “Make three new friends.”

If you want to read more about this resolution, check out…
Set a target goal of making three new friends.
7 tips for making new friends.
Start a happiness-project group.

If you’re new, here’s information on the 2010 Happiness Challenge (or watch the intro video). It’s never too late to start! You’re not behind, jump in right now, sign up here. For more ideas, check out the Happiness Project site on Woman’s Day.

* I loved this post on Mom It Forward about Mary Poppins and motherhood: 5 tips for creating magical moments with your kids. So many of my resolutions are aimed at this: Take time for projects, Take time to be silly, Start a new tradition, Be a treasure house of happy memories, and so on.

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— Go to your main drop-down box, click “Subscriptions,” find the GretchenRubin channel, click “Edit Subscriptions,” and check “Email me for new uploads” there.

  • Having spent the year focused on making new friends (and blogging about it), I can attest that there’s nothing that makes me happier. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it. Now I feel like whenever there’s something I really want to do that my husband’s not into–go see a Harry Potter film, try a dance class, go to the farmer’s market–I have someone to call. Having new friends really helps my marriage too. When I have women for “girl talk” I don’t unload it on my husband. I used to unload everything on him, and then get mad at him when he didn’t seem totally riveted and want to analyze things to death. Now I have friends for that, which makes me AND my husband happier.

  • Lharris103

    I moved to NYC right after undergrad and found it very hard to make friends in the city. I had always had a big group of friends and this was really getting me down, I felt so isolated. And my office, where most people meet new friends, wasn’t very social. Eventually I decided to stop whining about having no friends and do something about it. So I started chatting up my co-workers, suggesting group lunches and drinks after work and within a month, our entire office became very close. It has added so much to my happiness and I get excited to go to work and see my new friends every day. I learned that everyone is waiting to for someone else to make the first move and sometimes you just have to be the one to reach out.

    • gretchenrubin

      It takes a lot of emotional energy and social courage to be the one to say
      “let’s all go out to lunch” etc., but really worth the effort.

  • Joy

    Great video Gretchen!
    Seth Godin uses the term “friendlies” that I like a lot to describe online acquaintances who you do not necessarily have IRL friendships with. I love the idea of meeting people who you enjoy with no real pressure to force a friendship. I think we all have time to engage with some friendlies and if we enjoy them take it to the next level.

    • gretchenrubin

      I LOVE that term!

  • Cholwerk
  • This is a good attitude to have when we go into new social environments. I consider myself a fairly introverted person, but I love people, and I will definitely try to apply this advice more in my life. Thank you Gretchen!

  • I love this post, Gretchen! Although cheese is a close second :D, friends and family top my happiness list. I love meeting new people, but taking it beyond the meeting and truly ending up as friends, and having that person in my life for more than one event or an occasional happenstance meeting, is a choice. And, I love that you are encouraging your readers to be deliberate about their choice to make friends. Friendship is a huge opportunity!

    PS: Thanks so much for the shout out! My mom truly is a Mary Poppins-like mom!