Gretchen Rubin

Podcast 128: Connect with TV, Conquering the Snooze Alarm–and Is It Possible to be a Mix of the Four Tendencies?

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Update: Elizabeth is excited because tomorrow on the “Happier in Hollywood” podcast, she and Sarah talk about a very common happiness stumbling block: self-criticism. When is it helpful, and when is it toxic?

I'm excited because my new book, The Four Tendencies, hits the shelves in just 41 days. So close, and yet so far!

Pre-orders give a big boost to a book, so to thank readers who pre-order, I worked with a terrific production team to create a series of videos about the Four Tendencies. After the book goes on sale, I'll charge for these videos, but until then, you can get access to them for free if you pre-order. Find all the info here. There's an overview video, then subject videos on using the Four Tendencies at work, with spouses and sweethearts, with children and students, and in health-care settings.

Try This at Home:  Connect through television. On episode 9 of "Happier in Hollywood," the weekly "Hollywood Hack" was to "watch the TV shows your boss watches" to create an easy way to connect.

But TV is a great way to connect not only with a boss, but also with co-workers, teenagers, grandparents...many relationships. Have you ever used TV to strengthen an important relationship?

I quote from Tyler Cowen's Discover You Inner Economist: Use Incentives to Fall in Love, Survive Your Next Meeting, and Your Motivate Your Dentist.

Happiness Hack: Put your alarm device across the room, so you have to get out of bed in order to turn off the noise.


Four Tendencies Tip: If you want to take the Quiz, to see whether you're an Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel, it's here.

People often suggest that they think they're a mix of Tendencies, but I argue that just about every one of us does fall into one core Tendency.

That said, the Tendencies do overlap, and it's possible to "tip" to a Tendency that overlaps with your core Tendency. For instance, I'm an UPHOLDER/Questioner, and Elizabeth is an OBLIGER/Questioner.

Listener Question: Debbie asks how to figure out if she truly finds it fun to pursue the outdoor activities that her husband loves.

Elizabeth’s Demerit: Elizabeth has started playing a new app game, Two Dots.

Gretchen’s Gold Star: I managed to stay (reasonably) calm while Eliza and I were shopping for some things she needs for college.


Three Resources:

  1. To get the pre-order bonus, you can find info here, or at happiercast.com/4tbonus. You'll get the overview video as well as subject videos on using the Four Tendencies at work, with spouses and sweethearts, with children and students, and in health-care settings.  Free now; after the book comes out, there will be a charge for the video series.
  2.  I do weekly live videos on my Facebook Page to continue the conversation from the podcast — usually on Tuesdays at 3:00 pm ET. To join the conversation, check the schedule.

If you want easy instructions about how to rate or review the podcast, look here. Remember, it really helps us if you do rate or review the podcast — it helps other listeners discover us.

As I mentioned above, I do weekly live videos on my Facebook Page to continue the conversation from the podcast — usually on Tuesdays at 3:00 pm ET. To join the conversation, check the schedule.

Quote From the Podcast

People often suggest that they think they're a mix of Tendencies, but I argue that just about every one of us does fall into one core Tendency.
Gretchen Rubin

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Podcast 128: Connect with TV, Conquering the Snooze Alarm–and Is It Possible to be a Mix of the Four Tendencies?
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Podcast 128: Connect with TV, Conquering the Snooze Alarm–and Is It Possible to be a Mix of the Four Tendencies?

Podcast 128: Why it’s helpful to connect with TV, a way to give up the snooze alarm, and a discussion of whether you can be a mix of the Four Tendencies.
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Find out if you’re an Upholder, Obliger, Questioner, or a Rebel.

The Four Tendencies explain why we act and why we don’t actOur Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so understanding your Tendency lets us make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress and burnout, and engage more effectively.

Take the quiz