Update: For our upcoming Very Special Episode, Holiday edition, we want to hear from you: What is your Try This at Home for staying happier, healthier, and more productive over the holidays? It can be a challenge. So let us know what works for you — for dealing with family, for traveling, for managing temptations, anything. We can all learn from each other.
To find out if you’re an Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel,
take the Four Tendencies quiz here.
Try This at Home: Try to come up with a motto for your Tendency. Fun!
Strengths and Weaknesses of Rebels: How to identify and take advantage of the strengths, and counter-balance the weaknesses, of the Tendency.
Striking Pattern of Rebels: Whenever a Rebel is in a long-term relationship, whether romantically or at work, it’s almost always with an Obliger.
Another striking pattern: While Rebels want choice and freedom, some Rebels are drawn to areas of high regulation, such as the military, the police, and the clergy.
Listener Questions: “What are some strategies to use if you have a Rebel child?” “How do Rebels manage their inclination to rebel against themselves?” Plus a Rebel weighs in about how she sticks to her good habits.
The Rebel author I mention is Geoff Dyer. I highly recommend his book Out of Sheer Rage: Wrestling with D. H. Lawrence as a self-portrait of a Rebel.
Elizabeth’s Demerit: Elizabeth needs to get her car serviced.
Gretchen’s Gold Star: I’ve started a new habit: on my Facebook Page, each Sunday evening, I post a photo of all the books I’ve read that week. I love to shine a spotlight on books, and I get a lot of satisfaction from thinking, “Look at what I’ve read.”
Call for comments, questions, observations!
We’ve spent four weeks talking about my Four Tendencies framework for human nature. It has been fascinating. We’ve had so many terrific responses that we’re planning a round-up episode. So if you have more questions or comments, send them in!
- Take the Quiz to find out if you’re a Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, and Rebel here.
- Listen to Elizabeth and me discuss the framework here.
- Read the chapter on the Four Tendencies in Better Than Before
- Please, send in your questions and comments by voicemail, email, etc.
As always, thanks to our terrific sponsors
Check out The Great Courses for a wide variety of fascinating courses. Special offer for our listeners: go to thegreatcourses.com/happier to order from eight of their bestselling courses, including The Everyday Gourmet, and get up to 80% off. Limited time.
We love hearing from listeners
Tell us — did you come up with a motto for your Tendency?
If you’re intrigued by the Four Tendencies, and want to be notified when my handbook on the subject hits the shelves, text me at 66866 and enter the word “tendencies,” I’ll add you to a list to be notified when it’s ready. You can also sign up here.
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Want to know what to expect from other episodes of the podcast, when you listen to “Happier with Gretchen Rubin?” We talk about how to build happier habits into everyday life, as we draw from cutting-edge science, ancient wisdom, lessons from pop culture—and our own experiences (and mistakes). We’re sisters, so we don’t let each other get away with much!