My Secrets of Adulthood & How Each One Changed My Life | Gretchen Rubin [Skip to content](#content) [ ![](https://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/07/gretchenrubin-logo-768x344.png) ](https://gretchenrubin.com) - February 21, 2007 - [Secrets Of Adulthood](https://gretchenrubin.com/tag/secrets-of-adulthood/) # My Secrets of Adulthood & How Each One Changed My Life ![Secrets of Adulthood Soap and water removes most stains](https://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/02/Screen-Shot-2018-08-01-at-12.41.52-PM.png) What have I learned, with time and experience? Not much, I fear. **Here are my Secrets of Adulthood**. Although these items may not seem particularly profound, each one was a revelation when I finally figured it out: - The days are long, but the years are short. - Someplace, keep an empty shelf. - Turning the computer on and off a few times often fixes a glitch. - It’s okay to ask for help. - You can choose what you do; you can’t choose what you LIKE to do. - Happiness doesn’t always make you feel happy. - What you do EVERY DAY matters more than what you do ONCE IN A WHILE. - You don’t have to be good at everything. - Soap and water removes most stains. - It’s important to be nice to EVERYONE. - You know as much as most people. - Over-the-counter medicines are very effective. - Eat better, eat less, exercise more. - What’s fun for other people may not be fun for you — and vice versa. - People actually prefer that you buy wedding gifts off their registry. - Houseplants and photo albums are a lot of trouble. - If you’re not failing, you’re not trying hard enough. - No deposit, no return. #### YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE ![Gretchen Aphorism](https://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/DaysAreLongYearsAreShort_124845.jpg) [Secret of Adulthood: The Days Are Long, But the Years Are Short](https://gretchenrubin.com/articles/secret-of-adulthood-the-days-are-long-but-the-years-are-short/) ![Gretchen appearing on CBS to talk about Secrets of Adulthood](https://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/Author-Gretchen-Rubin-on-how-to-find-order-calm-and-joy-in-everyday-life-4-12-screenshot-1-768x432.png) [Highlights from the "Secrets of Adulthood" Book Tour](https://gretchenrubin.com/articles/highlights-from-the-secrets-of-adulthood-book-tour/) ![blue and silver scissors beside blue and silver scissors](https://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/8cxjzvpgkk8-768x576.jpg) [Hacks for Facing Life’s Challenges: Proverbs of the Professions](https://gretchenrubin.com/articles/hacks-for-facing-lifes-challenges-proverbs-of-the-professions/) #### DISCOVER MORE # Like what you see? 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