In Honor of Valentine’s Day: Some of My Favorite Books About Relationships

Two people laughing while browsing books in a bookstore

In celebration of Valentine’s Day, Elizabeth and I are going to do a Very Special Episode 260 of the Happier Podcast featuring listeners’ best advice about relationships. It can be any kind of relationship—romantic, friends, family, work.

So if you have great advice, send it our way! You can let us know on TwitterLinkedIn, Instagram, or Facebook.

There are many terrific books on this subject, and if you’re interested in reading more, here are some of my favorites:

Romantic relationships:




Relationships with children:


Work Relationships:


I can’t resist mentioning a few of my own books, too.

Wherever I go, people tell me that The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles That Reveal How to Make Your Life Better (and Other People’s Lives Better, Too) has helped the relationships in their lives, by reducing conflict, promoting compassion, and generally helping people get along better. I know that the Four Tendencies framework has helped me understand my husband, my daughters, my friends, and the people I work with.

Want to know whether you’re an Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel? Take the quick, free quiz here. More than 3.2 million people have taken it.

If you’d like a one-pager on using the Four Tendencies in relationships, click here to download the PDF “Tips for Using the Four Tendencies with Spouses and Sweethearts.”

Also, conflict in relationships often arises when one person is much tidier than the other. My book Outer Order, Inner Calm has a lot of ideas about how to navigate a situation where you and someone else have different ideas about the proper amount of order.

I could keep going…what am I missing? What are some of your favorite books about relationships? And what about novels? Pride and Prejudice, of course…and here are four more of my favorite novels about relationships.



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