Podcast 192: Why You Should Have People Over, Making Time for Your Side Hustle, and the Challenge of the “You Cook, I Clean” Approach.

Try This at Home

Have people over. Elizabeth is finally doing this! On the subject of energy—”Energy” is the first chapter in my book The Happiness Project

Happiness Hack

Have an audio book club. Elizabeth mentions a book she loves: Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a Silicon Valley Startup by John Carreyrou. In a previous episode, we discussed why you might want to choose an office TV show

Four Tendencies Tip

How can an Obliger make time for a side hustle? If you want to take the quick, free Four Tendencies quiz, to find out if you’re an Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel, you can take it here. If you want to listen to Chris Guillebeau’s excellent podcast, you can find Side Hustle School here.

Listener Question

How does a couple resolve a conflict about whether to follow the “You cook, I clean” model or the “I cook, I clean; you cook, you clean” model? I mention one of my favorite posts, about shared work—you can read it here.

Elizabeth’s Demerit: Elizabeth hasn’t been doing family updates. To hear us discuss our family updates, listen to episode 2.

Gretchen’s Gold Star: I give a gold star to my daughter Eleanor, who’s coaching me on Instagram. I want to explore more of its possibilities. Follow me on Instagram on @gretchenrubin.


  1. It’s never too early to request a bookplate if you want to make sure you receive it before the holidays. Request as many as you want (within reasons). U.S. and Canada only, alas—mailing costs.
  2. Let me know if you’d like to get the “Moment of Happiness” newsletter, where I send you a happiness-related quotation every day. If you’re already subscribed to my primary monthly newsletter, you can update your subscription preferences here.




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Every Friday, Gretchen Rubin shares 5 things that are making her happier, asks readers and listeners questions, and includes exclusive updates and behind-the-scenes material.