Update

Need a last-minute holiday gift? Give the Gift of Podcast!

Try This at Home

We’re ready to announce our yearly challenge for 2023: Go outside 23 in 23! #Outside23in23.

We’re so excited for this challenge!

For resources, links, and information about #Outside23in23, read all about the challenge here. 

Happiness Hack

Over the holidays, if you need a good family TV show to watch together, watch Fantasy Island on Hulu! Get ready for Season 2, which premieres on January 2, 2023.

Deep Dive: Post-Holiday Hacks

We asked listeners for ideas about post-holiday hacks and got many great suggestions.

Demerits & Gold Stars

• Gretchen’s Demerit: I can’t seem to make an appointment to get my hair cut.
• Elizabeth’s Gold Star: Elizabeth gives a gold star to the HBO TV show The White Lotus.

Resources

You can download the Happier app from the App Store or Google Play Store. Learn more about the app and the “Go Outside 23 in 2023″ campaign.

What we’re reading

Elizabeth: Then Again, Maybe I Won’t by Judy Blume (Amazon, Bookshop)
Gretchen: Dr. No by Percival Everett (Amazon, Bookshop)

Gretchen:
Hello and welcome to Happier, a podcast where we discuss cutting-edge science, the wisdom of the ages, lessons from pop culture, and our own experiences about how to be happier. This week we will reveal the yearly challenge for 2023, and we’ll do a deep dive into listeners’ post-holiday hacks.

[Music]

Gretchen:
I’m Gretchen Rubin, a writer who studies happiness, the five senses, the Four Tendencies, good habits, and human nature. I’m in my little home office in New York City, and joining me today from L.A. is my sister, Elizabeth Craft, now officially recovering from COVID. Thank goodness, Elizabeth, I’m so glad.

Elizabeth:
That’s me, Elizabeth Craft, a T.V. writer and producer living in L.A. And yes, Gretch. I’m healthy. Hopefully my voice is back to its usual monotone, non-raspy self.

Gretchen:
Excellent. Well, before we launch into the big reveal, we have a few updates.

Elizabeth:
Yes, Vira said, “On episode 405, you shared a question from a listener called Deirdre about hearing a brilliant, insightful thought on a podcast and not being able to take note of it. So I’ve started using the screen record function on my mobile phone to record the audio bits that I want to take note of or reflect on later.”

Gretchen:
Okay. So Elizabeth, I had never heard of this.

Elizabeth:
Neither had I.

Gretchen:
Yeah. They say take a screenshot and then you can go listen to the podcast later. If you use the screen record function, you can actually record a clip. There’s a button that you push. I’m not going to say how to do that because you have to go through your own phone, but search for how to record your screen. And if you are playing a podcast, I assume it works for an audiobook, it is a way to save it. It goes then into your photos and you can just hit it and it will play it again.

So you have the recording of whatever was being said. Plus, the photo captures the screenshot of the podcast and the timestamp as well. So you have all the information that you would have had in a screenshot, but you actually have the recording. So it eliminates a step, and this is just something I had no idea this thing even existed. I was so excited.

Elizabeth:
Yeah, I didn’t either. And you and I both figured out how to do it on our phones. So we now have that tool. Very excited. Thank you, Vira.

Gretchen:
Now, another thing. If you are looking for a last-minute gift, because we were coming up into the holidays, got to remind you about Gift of Podcast. You can print out this sheet, fill it out with the podcast that you’re suggesting for someone, and you can get that at gretchenrubin.com/resources/gift-of-podcast.

Elizabeth:
Yes and it’s free.

Gretchen:
It’s free. It’s an experience, not stuff, it’s great. And Elizabeth, a listener sent us yet another way to interpret your word for 2023 which is Scale. This is something that you and I ignored completely. I wonder that it didn’t occur to Chuck because this is more in Chuck’s realm.

Elizabeth:
All right, what is it, Gretchen?

Gretchen:
Okay. Jennifer wrote, “As I was listening to this 2023 word, I realized in other application: musical scales. It came to mind because I’m practicing the piano for a Christmas performance and lamenting how rusty I am, how I wish I had been at least practicing scales all these years. Scales are the most basic, fundamental musical skill to practice, but those who do it are rewarded with increased technique, speed, and musical mastery. In this application, scale can be a reminder to go back to basics and really build a strong foundation.”

So that’s great because it’s like scaling the mountain but also building the foundation. So it works kind of in both directions.

Elizabeth:
I love that. Yes, we should have thought of that. Not surprising, though, given how non-musical we both are that that one didn’t occur to us.

Gretchen:
And that’s why Chuck might have… Chuck’s so musical, it probably crossed his mind, but not ours. Okay, so, Elizabeth, this week our Try This at Home is our annual challenge. Oh, my gosh. So exciting.

Elizabeth:
Yay. Yeah. And we have been doing these annual challenges since 2020.

Gretchen:
Yeah, in 2020, we challenged ourselves and listeners to Walk 20 and ’20. We talk about that in episode 252. So it’s, you know, walk 20 minutes each day in 2020.

Elizabeth:
And then in 305 we had the challenge Read for 21 minutes every day in 2021.

Gretchen:
Then in 2022 we noticed that people seemed really worn out. Just, you know, 2022 was a year of kind of exhaustion. So our challenge was to Rest 22 and 22.

And this year it is Go Outside 23 in ’23. #Outside23in23.

Elizabeth:
So I love this, Gretchen, this is so good. So talk about what it’s going to do for us, what it means.

Gretchen:
Well, there are so many happiness-related reasons to go outside. I mean, so many good things happen when you go outside and we all know this. You experience the moment. You can often appreciate nature. You get a boost in mood and focus just from the sheer sunlight, you know, and there’s all this research into the circadian rhythm. More and more they’re finding all these things that light, especially early morning light, does to help regulate our bodies.

It can give us a moment of mindfulness. To do 23 in ’23, you do not have to be exercising. You could be sitting on your stoop and just enjoying the sunshine. But often, when people go outside, they tend to exercise more, whether they’re walking their dog or going for a walk generally, or whatever.

You can notice time passing.

I love it because of my Five Senses book. And like when you’re outside, you can touch the grass, look at the sky, sniff the air. You’re just… it just combines everything. And for me, of course, I love this for myself because of Wave being my one-word theme for the year. There’s just the waves of sensation. Like when you’re outside, you just feel much more like everything around you, whereas inside, I don’t know. It just doesn’t feel as vital.

Elizabeth:
Yeah, I mean, I have definitely gone outside more since having dogs because I have more of a reason to go outside and it for sure boosts my happiness. I mean, I think that’s one of the things that does make me happier in having dogs is just simply going outside. So I love this. And again, this is just going outside.

You don’t have to do any specific thing. Although, Gretch, I will say, I think for a lot of people, if there is a ritual to it, it myself, like maybe go outside every morning to drink your coffee instead of sitting inside or go outside after work for 23 minutes to transition between work and home, whether you work at an office or work at home.

Because I do think we found with the Rest 22 and 22 that it was helpful if there was a schedule to it, although there does not have to be.

Gretchen:
No, I think that’s exactly right. Another thing I would note is I think some people are starting to get worried about the numbers mounting up, like, okay, it’s 2023. What are we going to do in 2055? Don’t worry about that. Like we have other fixes in mind for those big years. Let’s hope that we all get there.

Elizabeth:
30 years down the road.

Gretchen:
Yeah, and 23 minutes may seem outside, say, but it counts as long as you are outside, as long as the door shuts behind you, it counts. And so if you can’t do 23 minutes all at once, yeah, maybe it’s 10 minutes in the morning, 10 minutes in the afternoon, and then like 3 minutes you’re just outside letting your dog outside.

And so everything counts, but I think you’re right to say if you build it into kind of a little activity, especially something that you enjoy, it’s going to be easier to stick to it.

Elizabeth:
Yeah. Another good time to go outside, Gretchen, is talking on the phone. If you have a phone call very often, could just as easily take it outside.

Gretchen:
Absolutely. I love this suggestion. And one of the reasons that… because we have a bunch of ideas for what the challenge would be, one data point was that, you know, we talked about the strategy of treats, everyone’s favorite strategy of the Better Than Before 21 Strategies for Habit Change. Strategy of treats is definitely the most fun. But one of the things we don’t want to give ourselves something to make us feel better that just ends up making us feel worse.

So a couple of times on social media, I said, “What are your healthy treats?” Because we all want to have a long list of healthy treats. And what I noticed is so often people would list healthy treats that involved going outside. So clearly there are a lot of treat like aspects. For instance, Melly said, “Walk around the neighborhood and observe decor and flowers or trees.”

Gretchen:
Natalie said, “Head down to the beach so I can feel the sand between my toes and listen to the waves.” Cathy said, “Go for a long walk in the woods by myself.” Christine said, “Stepping outside for a short walk to look at the trees.” So again, it depends on your environment. Obviously, like if you’re going to the beach or you’re going to the woods.

But people clearly are finding restoration and pleasure and this jolt of happiness from going outside. So it’s like, well, let’s shine a spotlight on that. Let’s say, “Let’s go outside,’ however that might look for the individual.

Elizabeth:
So, Gretchen, how do we get ourselves psyched up and make our plan to Go Outside in 23?

Gretchen:
Okay, well, there’s a lot of things that we’ve learned over the years that we’ve been doing. Okay. First, this is fun. I think, Elizabeth, if you’re going to commit to this, buy yourself a little fun something that signals your commitment. Like you get a baseball hat with a leaf or a bluebird or I, Elizabeth, I must say, I’ve sent something to you is coming your way.

I forgot to put a gift card in it, but when you open it, you will know that it’s from me. And you will know that it’s for this. Let’s just say it’s very on the nose. You love the stuff associated with your… so I thought of you. And I think it is a way to be like “I’m doing this,” right? Like I’ve got like a baseball hat with a tree on it. Like I’m in. Yeah.

Elizabeth:
The visual manifestation.

Gretchen:
The visual manifestation.

Elizabeth:
Another thing is prepare for weather. So I’m in Southern California, so it’s easy for me to go outside any time of year, but for other people it’s cold outside. So make sure you have warm clothes. Several listeners have emailed you about heated jackets and vests.

Gretchen:
They mention a company, Ororo. This is not an ad, we have not used this company. But I will say it seems like if you are in a very cold place, you might check that out. But Elizabeth, even for you, like do you need sunscreen? Do you need a baseball cap? Do you have sunglasses that don’t pinch your nose if you wear them on a long hike?

One thing you want to think is, are you ready for sun? Are you ready for cold? Are you ready for rain? There’s no bad weather, just bad clothes.

Elizabeth:
And then, Gretch, I love this idea of plan to make the most of it. Talk about this.

Gretchen:
Yeah. Like I was speaking to a friend who has a bud vase on her desk, and it’s like if she goes outside and she sees a leaf or a flower, she’ll put it in the vase just as a little way to bring the outside inside. Or maybe you’re collecting pinecones, and then you have a bowl of pinecones, just a sort of a decorative item.

If you think of are: there things that I can be looking for or ways that I can bring my outside experience inside? It’s another way to add pleasure. And I love the idea of the one little dandelion in the bud vase. Or whatever it might be.

Elizabeth:
Yeah. I was just walking with a friend who was collecting things from outside for her wreaths.

Gretchen:
Oh, well, there you go. That would be very cool. See, that’s, we’re going to return to this throughout the year, and maybe we’ll have activities like that. Crafts you can do with stuff. That would be fun.

Elizabeth:
Another idea is to read a book about outdoor experience to get you in the mood. For instance, my writing partner, Sara, co-host of Happier in Hollywood read “The Nature Fix” several years ago, and it completely changed her entire outlook on life and needing to be outside and partly led to her moving to Ojai.

Gretchen:
Yes, I remember because she was just like it just made such an impression on her. I remember that. Some other books had just come to the top of my mind; A Walk in the Woods, Pilgrim At Tinker Creek, Into the Wild 9a book that I was sort of obsessed with for a while), Second Nature. Gift From the Sea. Some of my favorite children’s books like The Secret Garden, The Magician’s Nephew, Heidi, they’re all about the outside.

So reading about something is a way to get yourself psyched up and remembering like why it’s something that you value and why it’s something that’s worth doing.

Elizabeth:
And then again, Gretchen, as we were talking about, research shows that making a plan for how to make a habit makes a huge difference.

Gretchen:
So whether you’re voting or you’re exercising or whatever it might be, if you have a plan on how you are going to fulfill a habit, it’s much better than just vaguely saying that you want to do it. So we have a lot of resources about habit change, obviously. So there’s the checklist for habit change, which is list the 21 strategies that you can use so you can figure out which ones work for you, you can read about them and Better Than Before and you mentioned something, Elizabeth, which is when does this fit into your day?

Like, is this I do this in the morning with my dogs or I do this as a break after work, or I do this in my lunch hour because I’m like, I’m restless after sitting at my desk, or I do this with a friend, or however you might do it. Or it’s simpler things like, I live in New York, I could walk to, not to the nearest subway station, but to two subway stations away.

And so that gives me a walk. And then I take the subway all the way into Brooklyn or whatever. You know, you can start thinking about how you would do it. But Elizabeth, this year, two things that are like revolutionary of the annual challenge. First is the challenge is going to be happening in the Happier app. So I have the app, the Happier app, and you can use the Happier app for free to do this.

Once you create an account, you’ll see the Outside 23 in 23 featured on the homescreen. If you tap on that content, it will guide you through setting up your aim to go outside 23 minutes each day and it will help you to choose a tracking tool so that you can track it because you want to track that you’re doing the 23 minutes.

It officially kicks off January 1st, but it’ll be there starting on December 19th. So if you want to get in there and get it set up and play around and get a feel for it, or if you want to just go ahead and start now because, you know, Questioners would say, “Why would I wait to January 1st? It’s an arbitrary date.”

Gretchen:
So, yeah, if you want to start right away, go ahead. If you already used the Happier app, you’ll see the go outside 23 and 23 material featured on the home screen starting on the 19th. And you can do this for free with or without a subscription, regardless of how many aims you’re already tracking. And then throughout the year, there’s going to be more ideas that we share about going outside, applications for people who’ve been using the app to try to make it as easy and fun as possible for people.

Elizabeth:
That is great. I will definitely be using the app, Gretch. I’m using it to track my number on the scale every day and I will also track this.

Gretchen:
Scale. Yeah. And so just for people to remember the kind of tools that you can choose from, what is the don’t break the chain, which kind of to my surprise, this turned out to be the number one tool in the app, especially for Obligers. The numbers trackers where you can log steps or minutes. The one-sentence journal if you want to kind of reflect on it. Photo log, that’s a very easy fun way to keep a visual record.

Accountability partners, if you need accountability. Track your total, if you want to measure numbers that add up over time. And here’s the other thing. Okay? So Obligers is the biggest category in the world. A lot of people who use the Happier app are Obligers. And so to create more accountability, because that’s what Obligers need, we’re going to do a challenge.

If we hit 1 million entries, however you’re tracking it, a million people logging that they’re doing this by the end of 2023, we will donate to One Tree Planted, which is a nonprofit organization focused on global reforestation.

So if you engaged your entry into the app, it will start counting. And you can tell yourself if I the more that I do it, the more consistently I keep it, the more likely I am to contribute to trees being planted in the world, which is a good thing. So if you’re an Obliger, I mean, this is a good thing for anybody to dom but if you’re an Obliger, this is a kind of an accountability because if you don’t do it and we don’t hit the 1 million mark, then all those little trees will not go and flourish in the world. And so do your part for the world.

Elizabeth:
Yes. And Gretchen, you know, in theory, we could do all of our former challenges together with this. You could listen to an audiobook while walking outside which will make you rest better so that reading, rest, and yes, exercise.

Gretchen:
That’s funny. Okay, it’s accumulative. This is great. Yeah, right. Well done. Okay, so you can download the Happier app in the App Store or Google Play. So if you want to learn more about the whole thing, go to thehappierapp.com/outside-23-in-23. But we’re really excited about this.

Let us know if you’re going to try it. Are you going to join us? Go outside 23 in 23. Do you have ideas about how you’re going to track it or what you’re going to do with your time? We can all learn from each other. If you thought of cool ways, cool things to do, whether using it for exercise or mindfulness, or just sort of appreciation of nature or engaging with others, like doing stuff with your kids outside or playing with your dog.

Elizabeth, this reminds me for Walk 20 in 20, so many people told us how happy their dogs were that they were going for walks. I bet there’s a lot of dogs like Daisy and Nacho are going to be like, “This is great. I get to play ball so much more.” They’ll be happy.

Elizabeth:
Yeah. So for the dogs.

Gretchen:
This is for the dogs. Let us know on Instagram, Twitter or Facebook. Drop us an email at podcast@gretchenrubin.com. Or as always, you can go to the show notes. This is happiercast.com/409 for everything related to this episode.

Elizabeth:
Coming up we’ve got a Happiness Hack that I am very partial to. But first this break.

[Music]

Elizabeth:
Okay, Gretch, time for this week’s Happiness Hack.

Gretchen:
Well, this is a hack for me because over the holidays, if you’re together with family and you need a good family T.V. show to watch together. I would say watch Fantasy Island because season two is going to premiere on January 2nd and you want to be up to speed with all the characters and all of the plot twists that have already happened.

So watch Fantasy Island. It’s so fun.

Elizabeth:
Yes, you can watch season one on Hulu.

Gretchen:
And I highly recommend the Christmas special. The ugly Christmas sweater subtle little touch was a favorite moment of mine of the season.

Elizabeth:
Yes. Yes. Please watch. And it really is a good family show.

Gretchen:
And now, speaking of the holidays, we are going to do a deep dive into post-holiday hacks. Many of the holiday hacks are best followed after the holidays, but you have to have them in mind to remember to do them, because so often the window closes before you remember to do all those clever things. So we asked listeners for their ideas and we got a lot of great ideas.

Gretchen:
Many, many, many people obviously said buy decorations and wrapping paper on sale, I’m going to remind myself of this year and really get out there.

Elizabeth:
Yes. And return and exchange things immediately. Do not wait.

Gretchen:
Several people mentioned if you feel too stressed about doing holiday cards, you can plan to send family cards at a different holiday, whether that’s Valentine’s Day, Thanksgiving, New Year’s. We did this in our family. We send Valentine’s cards as our holiday, and it’s so much easier to do it when it’s not part of the holiday tumult.

Elizabeth:
Yes. And then Anne said, “If you have a small family, buy smaller pans and cut down recipes. So you have the fun of baking, but not so much left over, often cut by half or a third. Look for mini pie pans and small baking dishes on sale after the holidays.”

Gretchen:
Good idea, Janine says, “I write notes on all boxes and containers, so I know what’s inside. I put items that I haven’t used in a few years in a pile to give away to my local buy-nothing group.” Yes, if you’re not using decorations, give them away.

Elizabeth:
Sharon said, “Our local nature center has a fun day for kids. They collect used Christmas cards so that the kids can cut them up to make cards for people in nursing homes. I save my used Christmas cards.”

Gretchen:
LeAnn said, “When my kids were younger and I was putting away the decorations, I assembled a separate box for December 1st items, which included things I wanted to bring out on that date next year. My kids’ reusable advent calendars, our Christmas countdown decoration, the Elf on the Shelf.” So this is your starter.

Elizabeth:
Such a good idea.

Gretchen:
Yeah. Get a little bit into the holiday mood, but you’re not ready to deal with the whole mass of stuff.

Elizabeth:
Laura says, “I shop at thrift stores for my decorations. Secondhand stuff leads to very creative Christmases. I just bought another nutcracker today.”

Gretchen:
Right. You’re giving things away that you don’t use. And then Laura’s there picking them up. So that’s good.

Elizabeth:
Yeah.

Gretchen:
And then I like Ellie’s. Ellie’s like, “If it’s not fun, don’t do it.” Good reminder.

Elizabeth:
Yes.

Gretchen:
Yeah. So thanks, everyone, for those post-holiday hacks. We just have to remember to do them once the holidays are passed.

Elizabeth:
Yes. Okay. Coming up, Gretchen gives herself a repeat Demerit. But first, this break.

[Music]

Elizabeth:
Okay Gretch, it is time for Demerits and Gold Stars and you’re up this week with a Happiness Demerit. And this is definitely one that you have given yourself before.

Gretchen:
Okay. Our mother is just baffled by this Demerit. So, haircut. So I never make a haircutting appointment until it’s well past the point at which I need to get a haircut, at which point I am desperate to get a haircut. And then of course, I can’t get one for like five months. And I said this to mom and she said, as she’s told me fifteen times, “Why don’t you just make a haircut appointment when you go in to get your haircut or like have a standing one or whatever?” And I’m like, that is just simply not possible. Who can do that? No one.

Elizabeth:
I know.

Gretchen:
So my hair is down to my knees. It’s driving me bonkers. And yet again, I just waited too long and it’s completely unnecessary. So I hope with this Demerit that I will somehow adopt mom’s system, which is clearly a good idea.

Elizabeth:
Yes, I do the exact same thing, Gretchen. So I definitely, definitely relate to your Demerit. I could give that to myself right now. The same one. I need a haircut as well. And I don’t even want to call because I know it won’t be for a long time, and then I’ll be mad at myself. So I just ignore the problem. Which is not going to go away.

Gretchen:
Now, this is irrational, and yet sometimes you’re like, you’re so angry at yourself that it’s not for so long that you don’t do it at all. And then it just. No, it’s like me when I wouldn’t I was so tired, I would stay up later because I couldn’t face going to bed. And you’re like, this is not a good solution. And yet it happened over and over. But Elizabeth, what is your Gold Star.

Elizabeth:
Look, Gretch, I am giving a Gold Star to White Lotus, the HBO television show. It just had its season finale. It was only seven episodes, season two, but I just loved watching it so much. And what is funny is I was talking to you about how much I liked it and since then, oh my God, it is everywhere.

So I am not alone in this Gold Star. It’s funny because some people really don’t like it and then other people love it. And I think that’s always fun in a show with people have strong opinions about it. And it’s funny because even though we do Fantasy Island, which is set at a resort, obviously, and very beautiful, I enjoy watching another show that is set at a hotel and very beautiful.

I enjoy the escapism of that and I think season two is even better than season one. And I think it’s great. I love watching something that everybody’s talking about that just gives me such pleasure in life. I’m the person that reads all the articles and looks for all the Facebook group discussions and all of that.

Gretchen:
So you miss the World Cup, but you’re there for White Lotus.

Elizabeth:
I’m there for White Lotus, which by the way, was created by a guy named Mike White, who’s incredibly talented and who I love because he was on Survivor one season. So fun fact. You know, I love Survivor, as does Mike White. So we can relate.

Gretchen:
Yeah. Okay. And so just as a side note, are you ever distracted when you’re watching it like, “Oh, that’s interesting how they set up the bar on the beach.” Or, “Oh, I wonder how they handled the wind problem.” Do you ever kind of find yourself just distracted by professional concerns?

Elizabeth:
I do think about those things sometimes, yes. Can’t help it.

Gretchen:
And does that make it more fun or less fun or it’s just something else.

Elizabeth:
More probably. I’m interested. Yeah, right. I think I do find it very interesting to think about that stuff.

Gretchen:
Right. The more you know, the more you notice. The resource for this week. Okay. Well, we talked about it, the Happier app, you can get it from the Apple Store or Google Play Store. And if you want to learn more and Go Outside 23 and 23 campaign, go to thehappierapp.com/outside-23-in-23.

That sounds weird, but you just put a hyphen between the words outside 23 and 23 and that’s what you’re doing. So it’s not as hard as it sounds. What are we reading, Elizabeth? What are you reading?

Elizabeth:
I’m reading Then Again, Maybe I Won’t by Judy Blume.

Gretchen:
Classic, and I am reading Doctor No by Percival Everett. And that is it for this episode of Happier. Remember to Try This at Home, join us for Go Outside 23 and 23. It is going to be a big happiness booster.

Elizabeth:
Yes. Thank you to our executive producer Chuck Reed and everyone at Cadence 13. Get in touch. Gretchen’s on Instagram @gretchenrubin and I’m @lizcraft. Our email address is podcast@gretchenrubin.com.

Gretchen:
And if you like the show, please be sure to tell a friend and give them the Gift of Podcast. Recommend our show. That is how people hear about our show.

Elizabeth:
Until next week, I’m Elizabeth Craft.

Gretchen:
And I’m Gretchen Rubin. Thanks for joining us. Onward and outside.

Elizabeth:
Oh, I love that.

[Music]

Elizabeth:
Oh, my gosh, Gretch, I cannot believe this. I forgot to say happy birthday.

Gretchen:
Well you emailed me yesterday, so I knew you remembered it.

Elizabeth:
Yes, but still. Happy birthday. I hope you have a great day.

Gretchen:
Thank you. It’s always fun to talk to you on my birthday.

Elizabeth:
Oh, good.

[Music]

Gretchen:
From the Onward Project.