Update
Whenever I work on a book, I write far more text than ends up in the published version. A “Secret Chapter” got cut from Life in Five Senses (and maybe you’ll be able to guess why, after you read it)—but I still think it’s an interesting story.
I’m offering it as a thank-you to people who have pre-ordered or bought the book. I appreciate it! Learn more at happiercast.com/secretchapter.
Try This at Home
Beware your vent/non-vent ratio in your conversations.
Happiness Hack
Use the Google app to identify something by taking a photo of it.
Four Tendencies Tip
A listener asks why SMART goals don’t work for Rebels, and how Rebels can explain that issue to others. SMART goals are: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound.
Want to take the Four Tendencies quiz? It’s free and quick.
Listener Answers
We share comments from listeners about what result they got from the new “Habits for Happiness” quiz, and what actions they’ve taken as a result.
Demerits & Gold Stars
Elizabeth’s Demerit: She and Sarah took their writing trip to Seattle, and she didn’t get her history reading done beforehand.
Gretchen’s Gold Star: I give a gold star to my daughter Eleanor, who persisted in “getting back in the saddle” with her bike-riding.
Resource
Pre-order Life in Five Senses and get the secret chapter here. Gold star for you!
What We’re Reading
*This transcript is unedited*
[474]
[Music]
Gretchen
Hello and welcome to a happier podcast where we talk about strategies, research hacks and suggestions for making our lives happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative.
Gretchen
This week we’ll talk about why it’s a good idea to beware of our vent to nonevent ratio in conversation. And we will answer a listener’s question about why smart goals don’t work for everyone, especially rebels.
Gretchen
I’m Gretchen Rubin, a writer who studies happiness, good habits, The Five Senses, human nature. I am here in my little home office in New York City. And joining me today is my sister, Elizabeth Craft, to whom I often vent.
Elizabeth
That’s me, Elizabeth Craft, a TV writer and producer living in L.A. And Jack writes, You took the words right out of my mouth. I’m an event. You’re often the person I’m venting to.
Gretchen
Yeah. What are sisters for? We have a high rent to nonevent ratio. But before we jump in, I want to remind everybody that my most recent book, Life in Five Senses, is coming out in paperback. As a thank you for people who preorder, because, as I often say, preorders do a lot to help a book by creating buzz among booksellers and readers and everybody, I decided to create a little treat for people who preorder, and this is a secret chapter.
Gretchen
So this is a chapter that did not end up in the final version of the book, though I experienced it and wrote all about it and then, of course, rewrote it for the purposes of this because I cannot help rewriting everything that I touch. But it didn’t make it into the book that I think it’s an interesting story.
Gretchen
Elizabeth, what do you think?
Elizabeth
absolutely. It was in the draft I read, and I probably wouldn’t have cut it, but I wasn’t making the editorial choices.
Gretchen
Yeah.
Elizabeth
I loved the chapter.
Gretchen
Well, when you read it, you’ll know you might be surprised by it. I will just leave it at that. It’s a little bit outside my comfort zone.
Elizabeth
And such as your sister. Of course. I have to mention that this book was a New York Times bestseller.
Gretchen
Well, thank you. What a nice sister. If you are interested in getting it, go to a happier cars.com slash secret chapter. This is for people who preorder the paperback. But if you ordered the hardback, that’s okay. You can still get the secret chapter. Yeah. So all the information is there at half your cars.com slash secret chapter. And thank you very much for preorders.
Gretchen
They do a lot to help the book. And now Elizabeth this week are try this at home suggested it is to beware of our event to nonevent ratio. Now, what do we mean by that?
Elizabeth
Yeah. So we all vent. It’s part of life or most of us events. I would say the vast majority of US events.
Gretchen
And it can be good event. It can be.
Elizabeth
Continuous is necessary, but sometimes times there are certain people in our lives who take the brunt of the venting. Yes. And it can get to a point where every time you talk to this person, all you’re doing is venting. And it can be a lot for someone to listen to. It also can give a kind of false impression of your life.
Elizabeth
So we think it’s good to be aware of how much are you venting versus not venting with different people in your life.
Gretchen
Right. And this is especially if it’s low level venting because you may be you know, sometimes we’re going through some huge challenge and we need to talk it through. But sometimes it’s just like, these petty annoyances, these little grievances, this bugged me so much. Or this person always does this. And so it’s not that it’s this deep need to confide or you’re really processing something big, but you’re just consistently venting.
Gretchen
Yeah.
Elizabeth
To me, grudge, the word venting sort of means that it’s not a level that’s serious. You know what I mean? If it’s yes, if it’s very helpful to a child having a real problem, I don’t consider that venting.
Gretchen
That’s a really good point. Just the very definition of vent means that we’re talking about those more minor grievances. But the thing is, it’s draining for the person that’s listening to you. If you come home every night from work and you’re just grousing about this little annoying thing and that annoying thing that happened that day, you can really end up draining other people.
Gretchen
And then also they can have a complete misperception of your experience. They might think, wow, this person really dislikes her job, where in fact you like your job. You’re just venting, inventing and venting.
Elizabeth
Yes, I think that’s funny. I think all the time that happens where one person thinks the other doesn’t like their job and they’ll say, no, it’s it’s the best job I could possibly have.
Gretchen
It’s just it’s like you reminding yourself. It’s a fun job and I enjoy it.
Elizabeth
That’s why we have that as our motto Branch has listening to us. Sometimes you would know.
Gretchen
That there is something called emotional contagion. We literally infect each other with our moods, and this happens in a flash. Like you can transfer your mood to somebody over the phone in a few moments, you can pick up an emotion from even looking at a photograph. And so because of this emotional contagion, we really affect each other for the better or for the worse.
Gretchen
And research shows that if you’re hearing someone griping consistently, it can bring down your own mood and give you negative emotion. So you’re venting to somebody. But there is a cost to them if it’s bringing them down.
Elizabeth
And one way this comes up is with kids in college.
Gretchen
I hear this from friends all the time, and we all remind ourselves, like, we’re just hearing the venting part because what’ll happen is a child will call and it’s like, this is terrible. I’m having all this conflict with my roommate or, you know, I’m having all this problem with this class and like, this is bad and this is bad and this is bad.
Gretchen
Then they hang up and then they go skipping off and have fun with their friends because they sort of relieve their feelings. And then the parent is left there thinking like, my gosh, are they okay? Is this going to work out? So they’ve picked up that mood from the vent and they’re hanging on to it even when the child maybe is moving on.
Gretchen
And so, again, if you’re if you’re the child in college, remember this or if you’re hearing it, I always remind myself and other people with my children, I’m always like, no news is good news. Probably if they’re not calling, everything’s fine because we tend to hear when something’s going wrong, and so the ratio is automatically skewed.
Elizabeth
Yeah, and I think this is why camps don’t want parents to talk to their kids. You know, that’s the thing about camp. You don’t get to call your child. And I think it’s because they know if the parent calls, the kid is automatically going to be like, I don’t like the food. I don’t like this, I don’t like that.
Elizabeth
But if they don’t talk to their parents, right, they’re fine. Right. So it’s just that parents automatically bring that out. I mean, I know I do agree, which I feel like I’ve sent to mom and dad still all the time. And I try not to, but, you know, they’re my natural people to go to.
Gretchen
To either the vent. I think about this because I’m exactly the same way. If I’m going to vent about something, I call our parents. And so I always try to remember. Well, I also want to another way to guard your ratio is to make sure that you’re bringing up good news or interesting things or funny things. Not to be Pollyanna ish, not to be fake, but just to remember.
Gretchen
it’s just as fun to hear about, my gosh, the dogs did something incredibly mischievous or this interesting thing happened in New York City or whatever. And, you know, we do our update, which is it’s okay to be boring. And you write those emails among ourselves. I just try to make sure that I’m including funny or happy or interesting things as well as things like this is a worry or, you know, this is we’re dealing with this just to watch that ratio.
Elizabeth
And it’s interesting with my friends Gretchen, a lot of times people will text each other or call and say, can I just vent for a minute? Yes. And I do think it’s helpful when you frame it that way because then the other person knows, okay, they’re going to get something off their chest. But this isn’t, you know, necessarily that deep.
Gretchen
Well, and it kind of you’re like, okay, that’s what’s coming now. And this is the role that I’m playing as is being that sounding board. But the fact is, you know, if there’s too much venting, it can be hard on a relationship because it can bring that other person down consistently. So that can be hard on them. And also, it might make you feel worse because one of the things research shows is that we think of it as something that like relieves our feelings.
Gretchen
But often people who complained experienced deterioration in their mood afterward. And like, there’s other research that suggests that people who share negative emotions on social media experience lower levels of well-being afterward. Maybe this is because you’re sort of directing your attention to the negative, so that’s just what you’re paying attention to. And again, it’s not that there’s never a right time to do this or right way to do it or that we all have to be fake or, you know, only talk about how the glass is half full.
Gretchen
Yeah, there’s definitely a place where it’s the right thing to do, but every medicine can become poison and you just want to keep an eye on it.
Elizabeth
And I on the venting to non venting ratio.
Gretchen
Well, the final thing is you know, we often talk about we should act the way we want to feel because our actions spark our emotions. A lot of times we think that we act because of the way that we feel. But in fact we feel because of the way that we act. So if you’re feeling reserved, you act friendly.
Gretchen
If you’re feeling listless, you act energetic, and in that way you spark those emotions in yourself. But if you act quarrelsome, you’re going to feel more quarrelsome. If you act annoyed, you’re going to feel more annoyed. And so it’s just good to keep an.
Elizabeth
Eye on that. Yes, absolutely.
Gretchen
So let us know if you tried this at home and how watching her venting to non venting ratio works for you. Let us know on Instagram threads tik-tok Facebook or drop us an email at podcaster Gretchen Rubin dot com. As always, you can go to the show notes. This is happier cars.com slash for 74 for everything related to this episode.
Elizabeth
Coming up, we have an app hack. But first this break.
[music]
Elizabeth
Okay Gretch, We are back with this week’s happiness Hack and it is from google.
Gretchen
Yes. Okay. So for this you need the Google app. This isn’t something you can just do when you’re searching in Google, you have to be in the app. So say you’re on your phone, you’re in the Google app, which you can download. And if you open it at the top, you will see a search bar that has two icons in it.
Gretchen
One is a microphone and one is a camera. And they’re both in this sort of Google colors. So this is what you do. You click on the camera and it will let you take a picture of something and then if once you’ve taken a picture of it, it will pull information about it, which is bananas. So if you take a picture of an artwork, it will tell you this is the name of that artwork.
Gretchen
Here’s the artist with links to things related to it. My daughter Eliza does it with items of clothing. If she sees somebody wearing an item of clothing that she admires, she’ll take a picture of it and then she’ll know who made it.
Elizabeth
And I think people do this with birds a lot.
Gretchen
of.
Elizabeth
Course. Yes. And trees.
Gretchen
That makes perfect sense. Yes, absolutely. I mean, there’s so many things that you just you’re like, what is that thing? Or, you know, who made that thing or where that thing come from? And now you can just take a picture of it.
Elizabeth
Yeah. Gretsch I’ve mentioned before that I’m in a Facebook group called Beautiful Table Settings, and people use this all the time to identify chain of patterns because, you know, there are thousands of China patterns.
Gretchen
yeah, yeah, yeah.
Elizabeth
Or what an item is. Sometimes someone gets something they don’t even know what it’s used for, right? They’ll use this feature to figure out, it’s a butter dish.
Gretchen
Well, that’s the thing is a lot of times with our own possessions, you’re like, Wow, My grandmother gave this to me. I like what? I didn’t even know what the story was, Right? Yeah. So it’s a way to do it that way. There are a lot of cool tools there, so if you open it up, like kind of poke around and see what other things you can do, like if you hit the microphone, you could just speak a question and it will provide the answer.
Gretchen
That’s very useful. So it’s a it’s a great hack.
Elizabeth
Yes.
Gretchen
Moving on to the Four Tendencies tip, this week, we got a question related to the four tendencies from a listener.
Elizabeth
Heather said, I’ve been listening to your podcast for years, but I never thought to send my boyfriend a link to your For Tendencies Quiz until I overheard him speaking to his boss about smart goals. What a surprise. He is a rebel. Can you say more about why smart goals don’t work for rebels? I’d love to arm him with some research he can share about why he needs a different method within corporate America.
Elizabeth
So, Greg, explain what a smart goal is.
Gretchen
Yeah, and before I explain what a smart goal is, if you don’t know what a rebel is or the Four Tendencies quiz that Heather is talking about, go to Gretchen Rubin dot com slash quiz. You can take the quiz and learn a little bit about the four tendencies, but this is a four tendencies tab so we’re assuming that everybody knows their four tendencies.
Gretchen
Okay, So rebels, of course, resist expectations outer and inner like they want to do what they want to do in their own way, in their own time. So keep that in mind when I explain what a smart goal is. So smart is smart, arty. It stands for specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time bound. Right? So you’re getting a sense specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time bound.
Gretchen
Okay. Mapped out on to rebels who like spontaneity, challenge doing things in their own way. Surprise some people feeling their way and it’s just it’s not the way they approach big goals.
Elizabeth
Yeah the only thing that I could apply to a rebel maybe is relevant, but yes, specific, measurable, achievable and time bound are not things that are going to appeal most likely to a rebel.
Gretchen
Well, and I should also say this doesn’t say anything about accountability or supervision, but it’s sort of implied there that there’s sort of a lot of check ins or deliverables and rebels tend not to like that. They don’t like people looking over their shoulder. They don’t like to feel micromanaged. And I don’t want to suggest by this that rebels aren’t good at achieving goals.
Gretchen
There are amazing achieving goals. They’re sort of unstoppable. Once they decide that they want to do something. They’re often extremely ambitious, you know, because whether you’re ambitious has nothing to do with whether you’re rebel or not. Some rebels are ambitious, some rebels are not ambitious. That is kind of not part of being a rebel. So rebels who are ambition will set themselves big goals.
Gretchen
But like it’s funny about rebels, often like the fact that something is achievable. They want something that everybody thinks is unachievable. They’re like, You think I can’t turn this around by the end of the month, watched me write. And so just the whole framework of this is not the kind of way to get a rebel excite it about something.
Elizabeth
So what can Heather’s boyfriend say to a boss or coworkers that they won’t take offense to to explain that this is not a good method for him?
Gretchen
This is something that rebels often talk about. Many rebels have said to me that they don’t like smart goals, which is that the rebel tendency is the most different from the other three. UPHOLDERS questioners and villagers are more similar to each other, and they often don’t understand the rebel perspective until it can be frustrating when you’re trying to explain to a boss because you can’t be like, you know, I’m so special.
Gretchen
Everything has to be different for me, even if you are thinking, Well, you know what? I am so special. Everything has to be different for me. Yeah. So I think the thing to do as a rebel is to just say, Hey, you know, I know myself. I know you can count on me to get stuff done. I’ve got the chops, I’ve got the drive, you know, I can do this.
Gretchen
But if you just let me do it in my own way. Let’s talk about what the ultimate aim is. And like, I promise you, I will get there, but just, you know, hands off the wheel and leave it to me. And, you know, you would hope that somebody would say, let’s try this out. Yeah. And if you can do it, fine in your own way, then fine.
Gretchen
Because if it works for you, all I care about is are we getting done what we need to get done and allow you to do it? And then, of course, the thing for the rebel is they do have to follow through with that because otherwise they’re not going to have the trust that they can do it in their own way and be counted on to follow through.
Gretchen
If a rebel wants to follow through, then they can now, this gets a little tricky when you’re in a team and the team is having the deliverables and the check ins, you sort of have to think about that. I mean, one thing you might remind a rebel is, well, you need to do this part of that overall thing by X date, because if I don’t have your numbers, I can’t run my numbers.
Gretchen
But again, it’s like this is information, consequences, choice, right? I’m going to give you the information that you need to make a decision. I’m going to tell you the consequences of your action or inaction, and then I’m going to let you choose. So I’d say something like, Hey, Bill, if you don’t give me the weekly numbers until Wednesday, then I can’t hand in my report and then I get in trouble.
Gretchen
And so which doesn’t seem fair to me because that’s just the only piece that’s holding me up. So then it’s like, I understand. If I don’t get you this number, then you get unfairly penalized. I don’t want that. So that makes sense to me about why I would do that. But again, you just you have to think about spontaneity, choice, freedom.
Gretchen
Explain to your supervisor. These are the things that get you going and you can be counted on to meet those goals in your own way. They are not smart goals, but they’re the kind of goals that work for you. So good luck.
Elizabeth
All right, grunts. Now we have some listener answers.
Gretchen
Yes, I have my habits for Happiness Quiz. Yeah, this is like very quiz. Heavy conversation again. Gretchen Rubin dot com slash quiz. And this tells people what is the one new habit that they should work on to boost their happiness. So it’s sort of like of everything that you could choose. Where would you start? This quiz will tell you where to start.
Gretchen
And so it’s been fascinated now that tens of thousands of people have taken it to see, well, what are the clusters of answers? You know, what are scoring high and lower? And two here, what do people think of their result and what are they doing with that result? How are they turning it into a habit? So here are just some interesting responses from listeners.
Elizabeth
Yes, this is from banks. I got the result of Boost your Energy by creating systems that improve daily life, which is so relevant and timely because what am I 24 for? 24 aims was to set up a home system with my husband so that we can free up mental space and have more space to enjoy life outside of home administration tasks.
Elizabeth
We are actively applying this now by listing out all the tasks we do to maintain our home and life staff, delegating those tasks and creating a system to track this weekly biweekly and monthly.
Gretchen
That sounds great. Amazing, Shantel wrote. I got Make mindful choices to spend money on valuable experiences, and this answer really resonated with me. So much so that you inspired me to invest in a cabin weekend getaway organized through my graduate MBA program. I wanted to share this because I ended up having one of the most enjoyable experiences of my life.
Gretchen
We went hiking, visited wineries, sang along to nostalgic music, made s’mores around the fire, under the stars. It was perfect. And if it were not for your quiz, I never would have signed up to go. So thank you for inspiring me to invest in my own happiness. How fun.
Elizabeth
yeah. I want to go on that weekend.
Gretchen
Yeah.
Elizabeth
Holly said I took your habits for happiness quiz. The moment I heard about it, my result was to cultivate an existing practice. I immediately knew exactly what that meant. It was time to double down on my interest in watercolor. I love hearing you talk about your own growing interest in watercolor. Gretchen Yeah, doing more watercolor painting has been on my annual list of aims for years since my 1904 2019 list.
Elizabeth
At least I made some halting progress buying supplies, watching a beautiful series of lessons, painting every now and then, but never formed a truly satisfying habit until I got my quiz result. One of the suggestions was to make it more convenient to engage in that activity regularly by dedicating a space to it. I had a hunch this would be true for me, so I tracked down to my basement and looked up and Odessa was stashed away.
Elizabeth
I tucked it in a corner of my dining room and set my brushes and paint on top. I’m not sure this fully qualifies as a strategy of convenience, but removing that one bit of friction has made a tremendous difference. I now sit down to paint for a few minutes here and there. No pressure to commit a big chunk of time to it, and seeing the space each time I pass by reminds me how much delight I get from sitting there.
Elizabeth
My quiz result and the accompanying suggestions were spot on a few weeks in. I am indeed much happier for having worked on this habit.
Gretchen
That’s so great. Yes, that is exactly how the strategy of convenience works. Just a little bit more convenience helps. And I have to say I was surprised by how high creativity related answers scored. More people than I expected, I should say had creativity.
Elizabeth
But is interesting.
Gretchen
Kellie wrote for your newest quiz. My answer was deepen your relationships by making regular connections. This is in line with my 24 and 24. One of my tasks is 24 dates with friends along with a hike with a friend and dogs, family and friend, game nights making a date to meet up with a friend who lives 90 minutes away at her place and 12 date nights with my husband.
Gretchen
It’s interesting how often they see this reflected in their 24 for 24. So, you know, people see themes.
Elizabeth
Yes. And finally, Betsy said, When I took your habit quiz, I got make meaningful progress by taking consistent action, which is 100% who I am. One project that I’m already cultivating as a habit is every day when I find a couple spare minutes, I search my photo role for today’s date. I then go through all the photos and either put them in photo albums, delete them or leave them.
Elizabeth
It’s not a perfect way to go through my photos, but I delete a few photos every day in a slow motion project to go through the thousands of photos on my phone and cut some of my digital clutter. It would be overwhelming if I expected myself to sit down and do it all at once. I would not do it.
Gretchen
Great way to use those little interstitial moments. And by the way, this answer was is one of the most popular answers to the quiz is make meaningful progress by taking consistent action. So that’s a great solution. It is fascinating. Keep them coming. It is fascinating to see what answer people got to the quiz and how they putting that into action in the world.
Gretchen
People are doing so many different things. Again, that quiz is a Gretchen Rubicon slash quiz if you want to take it. I love these answers.
Elizabeth
Yes. All right. Coming up, I give myself a reading demerit. But first, this break.
[music]
Gretchen
Okay is it it’s time for demerits and gold stars and this is an even numbered episode which it means it’s your turn to talk about a merit.
Elizabeth
Yes. Okay. Gretchen So recently Sarah and I, my writing partner and co-host of Happier in Hollywood, took a trip to Seattle to do research. We are a project that takes place in the late 1800s in Seattle, so we wanted to do some research and we had each gotten a few books to read about Seattle history before our trip.
Elizabeth
And you may see where this demerit is going. Ryan Idea.
Gretchen
We’ve all done.
Elizabeth
It. All of my research reading done before the trip. Yeah. Which I should have. So that is my demerits.
Gretchen
Well, I have that every time I travel. I’m like, Why didn’t I learn more about the history of Paris? Because it’s one of my secrets of adulthood is the more you know, the more you notice. Yeah. And, you know, you’re like, I read about that old bank or, that mountain is where x, y, z thing happened.
Gretchen
But it’s hard to do all that reading sometimes.
Elizabeth
Yes. And, you know, I’m so used to listening to books now that I have a shorter attention span when I’m reading actual pages. This is one of the you know, I love audiobooks, but I am almost too dependent now on audiobook interest, so I think that might have something to do with it. So anyway, I you know, luckily Sarah did more reading than I did so she could fill in the blanks.
Elizabeth
But for sure I would have gotten that much more out of it had I done more reading. So next time I’m, you know, put the nose to the pages.
Gretchen
So that’s another secret of adulthood. The more you put in, the more you get out.
Elizabeth
So that’s true. But it was a great research trip. Despite that. Despite my demeanor. Yeah. Okay, Gretch, what is your gold star?
Gretchen
I want to give a gold star to my daughter, Eleanor, because. Okay, rewind back to when Eleanor was small. She had a really tough time learning to ride a bike. And I think Jamie, my husband, would say that helping her to learn to ride a bike is probably one of his least favorite aspects of fatherhood in that in that era, neither one of them enjoyed it one bit, but she did learn to ride a bike, so there was a day where she could ride a bike.
Gretchen
So then she was going off on this trip where she knew there was going to be bike riding and she said, I need to get back into riding a bike. I bet I don’t even remember how to ride a bike. And I was like, literally riding a bike is the thing that people use as the reference point of something that you don’t forget how to do.
Gretchen
It’s like riding a bike. And she’s like, Yes, that I will be the exception to that. That’s that’s what she got herself access to a bike and she persisted and did it and got back comfortable on a bike and to the point where she felt like, I enjoy riding a bike. And then she actually like as part of this trip, she went on like a really long, arduous, demanding bike trip and she was so happy with herself.
Elizabeth
that’s she.
Gretchen
Said at one point she did start crying. she fell off. But, you know, sometimes it’s just you think I could save myself so much pain and frustration and discomfort and embarrassment just by saying, like, you know, I’m not going to do it. Yeah. And this is another secret of adulthood. We need to accept ourselves and also expect more from ourselves.
Gretchen
And I could have imagined Eleanor just being like, you know what? Bike riding is just not my thing. But instead she’s like, I’m an expect this of myself. And now she’s so happy, she’s having so much fun. She’s like, I’m going to do this for the rest of my life. Like she really has gained something from it. And of course, riding a bike is something that if you enjoy it, you really you know, it’s not like playing ice hockey where it’s kind of a lot of trouble to get yourself in the place to enjoy it.
Gretchen
It’s like bike riding is something you can really enjoy. So anyway, I really admire and she was very good spirit about it. She was not venting about it. She was like, I’m going to do this. So I’m just full of admiration because as somebody who is like extremely physically awkward and really bad at things like riding a bike, I so identified with the negative part of it and not the boss part.
Elizabeth
Yes, right. And I’m reminded of you and I used to with mom and Dad. We took summer trips to Nantucket and we would bike to the beaches. And I think you and I did a lot of venting and complaining about biking. But aren’t we glad we did that? Because a lot of biking experience.
Gretchen
That we did.
Elizabeth
Well, I’m inspired by Elinor, for sure. Get to do something hard.
Gretchen
Yes, to do something hard because you may end up adding it’s the atmosphere of growth. Yeah. We get so much from it. The resource for this week, again, if you want the secrets chapter that got left out from Life in Five Senses, it is at happy hour Cars.com slash secret chapter. I’m offering that as a thank you to everyone who has ordered or preordered the book.
Gretchen
And speaking of books, Elizabeth, what are you reading?
Elizabeth
I am reading The Heiress by Rachel Hawkins.
Gretchen
And I am reading Splinters by Leslie Jamison. And that’s it for this episode of Happier. Remember to try this at home. Watch your event to nonevent ratio. Let us know if you tried it and if it works for you.
Elizabeth
Thanks to our executive producer, Chuck Reed and everyone at Odyssey. Get in touch. Questions on Instagram threads Facebook and TikTok. Approach and Ruben. And I’m on Instagram and threads at Liz Craft.
Gretchen
And if you like this show, please be sure to tell a friend. Tell one rental, two friends, tell three friends. That is how most people discover our show.
Elizabeth
Until next week, I’m Elizabeth Craft.
Gretchen
And I’m Gretchen Rubin. Thanks for joining us. Onward and upward.
Elizabeth
Crunch. Your hair looks amazing today.
Gretchen
I got it cut yesterday. So this is like fresh from the salon. Like, enjoy it now. It won’t look this good again until I go back next time.
Elizabeth
It looks good today. Go to lunch.
Gretchen
At all from the onward Project.